Tom Arnold is a Big Bully.

I can't believe Biff crashed George's car! What a jerk. He got liquored up and got in a wreck. If only George would have stood up to Biff in High school, things might be different now. Biff might be washing George's car instead of destroying it. If only George had a second chance. If only.

My favorite line in the whole movie might be in this scene. Biff says, "I wanna know who is gonna pay for this? I spilled beer all over it when that car crashed into me. Who's gonna pay my cleaning bill?" That really sums up Biff. What a jerk. I bet he gets prank phone calls from people that he has pissed off that sound something like this.

"Biff? You're a turd... a stinky fat turd, go sniff a jock strap, you poop head. You love patting boys butts, butt, butt patter! You're a perv and a loser and a stinky turd."

I miss you Haverchuck.

Dial 0 for 00ps!

Is it acceptable to rip a page out of a public phone book? I've always been under the impression that it is, and I think this scene is the reason I thought this. I think I saw this movie as a child, and subconsciously told myself 'Destroying a public phone book is okay.' I've actually done this two or three times in my life. Once in middle school when I saw a name that I thought was funny and wanted to show my friends. I don't remember the name now, it probably was something like Kevin Pooply or Brian Fartstorm or something. I wish I still had that page out of the phone book! The other time I remember destroying a phone book I was on a family vacation in London and I ripped out a page from the front of the book that had the subway map on it. I thought it would be cool to have.

But the more I think about it, I don't think tearing out pages from a phone book is socially acceptable. What if somebody really needs Brian Fartstorm's number and that page is missing from the book? What if that casuses them to miss an important bussiness lunch with Mr. Fartstorm? Besides it's also destruction of property! I feel so ashamed. I am going to overpay my phone bill by like ten cents this month. Would that be proper reparations Bell Atlantic? Are we squared away now?

I wonder what else I internalized as a child that is way off what is acceptable? I wonder if people can actually hear me when I say 'Time-Out' and start talking to an imaginary camera. Zach Morris, you've made a fool out of me.

Dance the Night Away

Good Morning! Doc seems really excited about this dance that is coming up this weekend. It's a shame that he is going to be busy that night. It really sounds like something he'd like to attend. Besides he is to old to pass for high school age, and I doubt any girl is going to invite him. I am sorry Doc. I know it sucks not being asked to go to big dances, but you have important time machine things to do! You have a boys future to save! The whole time space continuum thing depends on you! Stay strong, stay strong.

Doc looks like he is 90 years old in this drawing. He kinda looks like my landlord. That's an artists mistake. Imagine Doc at least 15 years younger. I am going to fire my illustrator. Look out for an add in the penny saver.

Deconstructing Marty

Yeah I know, this scene takes place in a car. I know. It's just that every time I draw people sitting in a car it looks like two blobs sitting inside of a blob. So, just pretend they are in a car. Or not, I don't really care what you think.

Sometimes I draw a picture and know exactly what I am going to say about it. Other times I draw a picture and have know idea what I am going to say. This is one of those times. I had to really look at the picture in depth to figure out what I was going to say. And then it hit me, I just drew Marty as Woody Allen. Put some glasses on Marty and it's a dead ringer. So that got me thinking, how awesome would it be if Woody Allen played Marty? I think that would up the BTTF amazing factor by X25. So with out further delay, Woody Allen as Marty McFly.

"Jeez, my mother wants to have sexual relations with me, talk about a reverse Oedipus complex. Oh, and what's this, you smoke too? Jeez, do you know how bad that is for you? Let alone what it does to an unborn baby in utero? If you keep this up I am going to come out of the womb near sighted with all sorts of psychological disorders. Jeez, I am never going to grow to be taller than five feet tall. I am only going to be attractive to fifteen year Vietnamese girls with daddy issues. Oh boy, I need to talk to my analyst. Why is my hand disappearing? Oh, man, now I am hallucinating."

End Scene.

Toy Cars and Monster Attacks.

Good Morning! Is Marty trying to get back to the future, or is he trying to win a Pinewood Derby! You can get your merit badge later. Seriously. This is not the time to be playing with toy cars. You have a future to save! Besides in about ten seconds you can get your fire safety merit badge.

Doc is a pretty good model city builder, huh. He could get a job as a set designer on Godzilla. Marty should tell Doc about Godzilla before he leaves for he future. Maybe slip it in that note if he needs to.....

"Dear Doc, the night I go back in time you get shot by terrorists. P.S. Godzilla will be awesome! A real cultural phenomenon! Look into to getting a job building miniature cities for that crazy monster to destroy. Peace out.
Your Friend,
The M-Dog."

I am Talking Directly to You

Good morning. Look at this. Now that they've figured out a source of 1.21 gigawats Doc is pretty confident that they can send Marty back to the future. He is so confident that he turns away from Marty and points directly at the camera as he proclaims this. Marty is in the background thinking 'Hey, Doc, I am over here.'

Uh-oh. I think Doc just broke the 4th wall. That's a theatre term. Go read Our Town, you'll understand. It's by Thorton Wilder.

I think Marty should give Doc a Hi-five right about now. I think the moment calls for it. I know they didn't have Hi-fives in the 1950's. But they didn't have rock and roll or skateboards either, so it's cool Marty, go for it! But don't get all crazy and try to pull a 'Slap-me-high, slap-me-low, to-slow' gambit. Doc's definitely not ready for that!

To The Moon, Loraine, To The Moon.

Here's a picture of George eating peanut brittle and watching Jackie Gleason. He seems to be enjoying himself. That's nice. It seems like the world has really beaten him down at this point. I am glad he has peanut brittle and Jackie Gleason as an evening respite from the real world.

How do they make peanut brittle? Here is my guess. Mix peanuts and peanut butter together. Put in a pan. Sprinkle sugar on top. Bake at 300 for half an hour. Enjoy!